As I sit here, My mind at full speed, it haults to a calming stop with the thought of you. I used to give my all to men who didn’t know my worth, I was willing to fight with every part of myself but they never cared about it. They didn’t care about me. My heart was overbearing, they didn’t know how to protect and appriceate it. I felt like I was always having to beg for their attention or love because they had no idea I was so easy to love, because they didn’t understand me or speak my love language. All ive ever wanted is to love and be loved. That’s why I know I deserve someone whos biggest fear will be losing me, someone who sees my worth and my heart for what it is, who will cradle it in their hands with gentle care. Some one who will walk through the fire and fight the battles and demons thrown our way just to make me feel happy, safe and protected as I would for them. I think I found it.

I tell you that I overthink, That ive been through the ringer a few times, but you really know me already with a single look. You see through all of this complication that brews in my mind and soul and my vulnerability at its peak. I don’t need to be someone else for you. You understand I’m coming from a dark place, you get me. I smile because I have survived everything the world around us has thrown at me. I smile because when I got knocked down I got back up, and this time there you were and I don’t feel alone. Like the brightest star in the sky ive been waiting to see through all the madness of the city lights dulling its true shine, is shinning brighter then ever, I was meant to see you shine. I was told one day, I would find someone who chooses me, and would continue to choose me. Everyday, And that then, only then would I be truly thankful everything happened the way it did. For now in this moment, its surreal and I see it. I wouldn’t change a thing because I found you and I’m happy where I am at. We started out as undercover lovers, and now were not afraid of what the world thinks, together we make magic and its unstoppable, fresh new and exciting where will this go. I’m all in, I want you to be the one I hold when I lose control, my mind can be destructive and I can change thee atmosphere with a single breath, my passion is powerful. So I ask of you to have patience with my delicate soul. I prayed to God for someone to rescue me when I’m used to rescuing myself. You found me in a delicate place. I was Caught in the riptide, I wanted to love somebody, I wanted to feel loved and I was lonely. Someone to love my flaws, to see my passion and depth and not be jaded by its intensity that it intimidated them all so significantly to run. I thought it was impossible, until you. I think you see me, I think you get me. I really hope I am not wrong, what a hiccup chapter that would be in the crazy book I’m writing of life. I don’t care what they say, what they think, I have feelings for you, I’m so scared but I breath in and just soak up these moments, how real and raw this is. Cherishing it for what it is, holding on tight. What were creating is big, I feel it. Were going to be something else. God has big plans. Everything we have been through was to prepare us for the very future he holds for the both of us. I hope that the words I’m saying as you read my heart speaking through my keyboard don’t scare you. If Gods plan is that this is yet another chapter, a stepping stone to our real destiny so be it, But I feel it in my soul that this isn’t a short term chapter. You dug in deep inside and got a hold of a part of my heart no one ever has so effortlessly. You tell me you’ve waited for me for a long time and I choke on my words, you make me so shy I hide my face, that’s the vail being lifted over and my vulnerability, leaving it open and showing.

Things are going to play out and happen the way they’re supposed to happen. Everything ive ever wanted in those ocean blue green eyes, that soul of yours ignites a fire inside me. Place your hand in mine, don’t let it go, were going all in. Your smile warms my soul and brought me back to life, that I’m not alone, I found someone who gets me. Don’t run like the rest It will break me, for ive been broken to many times. crossing my X’s, Sleeping all alone. Numbing the pain, now I want to feel, everything. You make me feel alive. I thought you weren’t down for me, that first night but you saw they were wrong about me. We have all the time in the world, I’m just lost floating in this moment, I’m in a safe place with you. Its been me myself and I, now I melt into your arms into your touch. I tremble as we kiss. Nothings ever felt so right. I feel so high right now I don’t want this feeling to end. You see the light in my darkness, I see the light in yours. Your hearts pure as gold and it shines so beautiful. Now I am aware of my thoughts in this world, when I kiss you with my eyes closed its like the whole world stops spinning and its just you and I in it. I put My head on your chest listening to your heart beat, you have all of me, everyday were discovering something brand new. What a journey this will be, I think ive found what ive been looking for. The last few months ive been spacey, drugged and jaded on these pills. Constantly sorry for being me to those who don’t understand my mind, in a place where I didn’t need to be. But then you came along and you get me, i get you, I see you and you see me. You tell me slowly, when I look at you and you look right through me, I can feel that this is real. Please don’t let this all be in Vain. You tell me all the things they never showed me, they never loved me, I feel it when you tell me I’m special, I feel you when you touch me, all my fears in my head just go to bed. My mind is quiet-sober seeing clear for the first time in months. Never leave me Lonely. I needed to go through all of this to learn to love me, so I could love you. I think ive found what ive been being prepared for. I hope I’m right, I hope this is right. It feels right. I’ll lean on that for now. Because when I Love, I Love hard.

I am only human. We go into all of this blindly. Ill Put you at the top of that pedastol if you let me. I think ive found it… I think I found you. Lead the way..

XOXO Maldo